How do I start to convey the heartbreak and unhappiness that occurred on and after January 6, 2021?
Women and men who died that day by the hands of police brutality and chaos, to not overlook the lives misplaced to suicide. Two years later, I nearly met the identical destiny after I put a 9mm spherical by means of my chest and survived by the grace, love, and mercy of God.
March 21, 2013 was a pivotal day in my life – the day I made a decision sufficient was sufficient. I used to be woke up at 5 am to show in my sheets and blanket, then to get breakfast. This was a traditional routine for the homeless shelters I had been residing prior to now couple years. I used to be 21 and had progressed right into a full-blown heroin addict. I had nothing however the garments on my again, which I picked up from a clothes donation field. I used to be unrecognizable. It was freezing in Louisville, Kentucky that morning and as I wandered to a payphone, I noticed I had no person to name. Household and pal had been completed with me, and I used to be totally alone. As I went again inside and laid within the nook amongst different homeless of us attempting to remain heat, I stated my first prayer “God, please assist me!”
And that’s simply what he did. This shelter, unknown to me, is nationally acknowledged as a free, long-term, and extremely profitable restoration program! Very difficult, however it confirmed me the best way to dwell a life free from medication and alcohol, stand by myself two toes, and maintain myself accountable. They taught me the best way to be a person. Upon completion, I received a terrific job the place I superior shortly. I wished extra, although, so I enrolled in faculty and pursued a nursing diploma. My household returned to my life, and we have now a tremendous relationship that has grown nearer by means of the years. I discovered my ardour for bodily health and diet, and have competed in a lot of physique competitions over the latest years. Driving bikes and skydiving are prime hobbies of mine. Above all, I rescued my #1 finest buddy, Mico, my pointer hound. Up to now we’ve traveled 11 states collectively.
It wasn’t till election 12 months in 2016 that I discovered my curiosity in politics. Because the political local weather heated, I couldn’t assist however discover the media’s fixed backlash and insults towards Trump forming public opinion. Ultimately, I did my very own analysis, and my findings shattered my wall of ignorance! The extra I investigated, the extra my patriotic delight grew. I used to be dumbfounded at how misguided so many have been proper right here in their very own nation! I’ve sadly come to comprehend this a willful ignorance. I sat out to be the voice of fact towards the lies being spoon-fed to the American individuals. I unapologetically love President Trump and my nation. Arriving on the “Cease the Steal” rally on Jan 6, 2021, the overwhelming feeling of camaraderie amongst a whole bunch of 1000’s of fellow patriots was not like something I’ve ever skilled. We unified that day to induce elected officers to carry off certifying the ballots and examine key election states.
What began off as a peaceable protest turned to mayhem when purposefully overwhelmed cops started aggressively assaulting the extra susceptible within the crowd. I can not at the moment put into specifics about that day, however could the lives misplaced NEVER fade away. Ashli Babbitt who was shot, unarmed, by Officer Michael Byrd. Kevin Greeson, Benjamin Phillips, and Rosanne Boyland who I’ve a particular reference to. One other gentleman and I pulled Ms. Boyland from a police line the place she was trampled after which savagely overwhelmed by officers as she laid there helpless. Out of harms method and never having discovered a pulse, I carried out resuscitations for a number of minutes to no avail. Rosanne Boyland, the patriot from GA, was pronounced deceased round 6 that night.
I walked away that day with my head hung low, filled with anguish. Joe was licensed president, outrage was pouring out from each media station, and I used to be immediately labeled an insurrectionist!
Individuals I by no means met have been doxxing my job and loss of life threats flooded my social media. Arriving residence the subsequent morning, I used to be instructed a selfie from the rally had been re-tweeted 641 occasions, every time tagging the FBI. The federal government’s manhunt for “J6’rs” amplified by the minute it appeared, and I anxiously knew my day was coming. The morning of January 13, 2021, terror befell me as FBI brokers swarmed my residence. After 2 hours of questioning and looking with no warrant, they seized my telephone and left.
Over the subsequent few years, my life took a downward spiral. I turned a pariah in my very own city. After years of striving to achieve my aim to work in crucial care nursing, I resentfully stepped away from the medical area after an unjust discount in pay and hours. The connection that developed with God years in the past in that homeless shelter had lengthy since fizzled out. I didn’t perceive that this relationship was the supply of my power and essence of my life. I sadly admit I had used God. My restoration took a backseat, my pursuits turned unimportant, and I misplaced my goal. In October 2022, I relapsed and I plunged into darkness.
The regret, horror, and hopelessness of 1/20/23 are unforgettable. Coming to from a 3-day, drug-fueled bender, despair and self-pity stretched throughout me and consumed me like quicksand. Mico was subsequent to me and I gave him large ole hug, received myself collectively and headed out the door. I barely observed how frigid it was as I sat within the abandoned area throughout from my home. I misplaced myself within the grey, overcast skies and couldn’t assist however discover how eerily quiet it was. My household was unaware of my relapse, however knew of the difficult occasions I used to be going by means of. I merely despatched them a textual content letting them know the way overwhelmingly grateful I used to be for them and the way a lot I cherished them. I tossed my telephone and changed it with my Glock 43x 9mm. I used to be unbelievably calm as I leaned my head again, closed my eyes, and pulled the set off… I unknowingly missed my coronary heart by millimeters, however I knew I hit my lung by my incapacity to breathe as I noticed I used to be about to die. Neighbors heard the gunshot and paramedics quickly arrived. After three intense operations and clearing of a nasty an infection in my lung, I absolutely recovered bodily. Throughout my hospital keep, a longtime sober pal visited and supplied me a possibility on the identical restoration program I went by means of 10 years earlier than. They only constructed a brand new location in Wilmington, NC. I knew what it took to get clear (not simply NOT utilizing), however this was a possibility to start out contemporary, get centered, and get again on my toes in a brand new space. Earlier than I used to be discharged, I begged God’s forgiveness for my full selfishness and that it doesn’t matter what circumstance, I might observe His will and be a residing testimony to Him. In February of this 12 months I made the transfer to North Carolina and wasted no time getting myself and my life again on monitor. A well-liked saying in 12-step fellowships is “restoration is an inside job,” and that is what I missed all these years. I labored on what individuals would see somewhat than who I wished to be – a person of integrity, self-discipline, self-control, and honesty. I turned energetic in a neighborhood church. I developed a private morning routine during which I align myself with my Creator and His phrase. I convey my pleasure in addition to my troubles to Him, then I sit nonetheless an take heed to route. I strive on daily basis to dwell proper by God and manifest good Karma for myself and people round me. I’ve an inside peace and fullness that I by no means knew existed. I’ve discovered goal, which means, and route in my life.
This didn’t occur in a single day and it’s certainly been an uphill battle. My (now ex) partner left me a month into remedy, draining my funds, and abandoning my canine to the shelter. Troublesome and soul-crushing doesn’t start to explain these occasions, however with probably the most superb family and friends, and a no-excuse angle, I made it by means of even stronger. I don’t surrender and with God, it’s all attainable. 7 months into my transfer, a tremendous profession alternative opened up for me. I began a neighborhood outreach program in lower-income neighborhoods during which I supplied free exercises and diet steerage. I sponsored different males new in restoration, giving again what was freely given me. I used to be additionally in the course of organizing with a neighborhood coordinator, a walk-a-thon fundraiser for households of misplaced family members to suicide.
This all ended August 24, 2023, when 2.5 years after the FBI confirmed up on my doorstep and arrested me on seven felonies. I’ve been to 4 completely different jails, having spent a month in solitary confinement. I’m now in DC’s DOC, C3A – or higher referred to as the “Patriot Pod.” I’ve met a few of the finest guys right here and have been welcomed with open arms. I’m past grateful for our supporters, and people who stand by us. I’ve been supplied my first plea for 10-15 years! For protesting! This typically seems like a horrible nightmare, truly dropping a decade of my life, however its very a lot actuality.
Whereas I’m unsure what the end result of that is, I do know that God is larger than the courts, and He’s not carried out with me but. I attempt on a regular basis to be the sunshine in his darkish time, particularly for my household and people round me. Fact will prevail! Thanks for studying. God Bless.
